Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Stronger Now

I'm trying to pick up the pieces in my life now :) I make an attempt to jog or do yoga on a daily basis, try my best not to miss morning classes, do my Japanese homework, and pray before i sleep every night.

Actually i just got use to sleeping alone with my lights turned off. It's actually not that scary after all. Took me 20 years to realized this.

What has been bothering me is just the way my love life has been.



Sometimes, i just couldn't find the right words to say to that special someone anymore.

And it is left unsent, unsaid, unwritten, incomplete.


In life, i've met sisters that i will always cherish.

The ever faithful and trustworthy a ma.

The sweetest ah be.

Vivian my love.

The imperfect happiness.

One and only momoput.


Aun who cares most.


Then comes the time, where someone decides to move on from me completely. 

Maybe too much pain has occurred, too little understanding came around. Where those three words have been said too many times, but it is still not enough. 



Along the way, i achieved something worth being proud of.

 A whooping 3.93 GPA.


2 Deacon Award certificates.


I learn too, that there are plenty of things worth noticing around me.

Like the rain drops on a bus window.

 The joy on his dirty face.

 The pink roses that hardly comes by.

 The staircase of KMJ - Blok D.


 Zac!

 The view of the sun setting from a beach cafe.

 The sexiness this beautiful Siew Mai portrays.


And as i go on each day, i fight for the Faith in my heart to stay alive.



As if heartaches weren't enough, I went through physically painful times too.



 This was painful as hell.





I cried. Those amateur nurses were idiots. And the old ones just got annoyed that i'm crying. They yanked it out and put it in again and again because they couldn't find my vein.

Glad that's over.


I threw a real surprise birthday party for the first time.



Meet a group of hardworking friends that i never thought i could have fun with.


I wasn't even drunk yet.


And of course, i got drunk a couple of times this year. 
 (Okay, tons of time)



Learn a new language.

Looi Irene Kawai


From a stern but loving 60 years old Japanese.


I spent 1 year with a group of people that was randomly thrown into a same apartment together.



And like many people, i did mistakes in life too. 

 Like perm my hair.

Eating like a pig with an ugly hair.

Piercing 2 holes at the same time on my belly button. Now closed btw.


Apart from the sisters above, I meet some really sweet and friendly guy friends in life too :)

 Afiq.

 Szeto.

Mike :) 


I also met someone unforgettable and deeply disturbed.

But i like him just so much because he's crazy.


The one person that i'll always be filled with concern, gratitude and love for. 

The one who introduced me to plenty of joy in year 2007/2008.


I climbed Mt. KK. too. Where i experienced that the voice in your head is way more powerful than what your body says.



We make goals, and forget them so easily. Don't you think? Like my 45 kg goal. 
It's been 9 months, i'm still at 50kg. 



Wha ... ? I keep forgetting 45kg. 


Then there's people that has high tolerance towards Irene. 

Sook Ping

Snoopy Lover


And people who i'll never cease to pray for each night.



Momo


Le Le

Zher Zher

Yung Yung






In life, we can probably lie to our parents and go to Paris, just once. 


Gotcha.


Well. 


Sometimes, you wake up from a dream.



But you know what?

Life will always be good.
Just be strong and take a big first step out when you're ready if something closes you in.

This was what i learned in the past few weeks.

 ❤

Stronger now